Lesson 11: Change your body, not your image.
Today’s Lesson is one every young girl should know if they want to stay hot their whole life. A woman’s body will change as she gets older, regardless of how much time and effort they put into trying to prevent it. The trick to aging is to develop an aura of hotness around you, and maintain it despite what your body looks like. Today’s example is the lovely Tiffany Thiessen, formally Tiffany Amber Thiessen. She has gone from hot girl next door with a slutty sexual appetite to hot boss next door with a slutty sexual appetite, and has used her boobs through it all. We salute you miss Thiessen.
Lesson 10: Areolas are Nipples Too.
Today’s lesson is on the part of the human body known as the Areola. In anatomy, the term areola, plural areolae, (diminutive of Latin area, “open place”) is used to describe any small circular area such as the colored skin surrounding the nipple. While technically an Areola is not part of the nipple, exposing it to the public is as socially unacceptable as exposing a nipple; therefore today’s lesson falls under our Visible Nipples series. An Areola slip is easier to achieve then a “nipple slip”; in fact, every nipple slip has an Areola slip (well, unless the celebrity is specifically trying to hide their Areola.) Areola slips are caused by the same problems that cause nipple slips; these include clothing that is too loose or too tight, ocean motion, and even the wind. Below are some examples of Areola slips, headlined by Jessica Simpson, who has had a few. There are more pictures of various other celebrities and their Areolae in the comments section.
Lesson 9: If you can’t find work, work at looking good.
Today’s Lesson comes from a child actress all grown up. Dear Lacey Chabert has not had many big films of late, or really any films at all (except a role in Mean Girls, right?). But despite not having a Party of Five to call home anymore, she does manage to get her picture taken. How? She grew a great chest and knows how to use it. Good Job Lacey.
Lesson 8: Red Lipstick will not make things sell.
Today’s lesson is a simple lesson in marketing. Our example today is miss Emmy Rossum, a beautiful girl from such films as “When Weather Goes Bad” (or whatever it was called… the day after tomorrow?) and “When the janitor goes bad” (err Phantom of the Opera). Dear miss Emmy is trying to promote her new CD, looking all bright and flirty wearing her very red lipstick on her very pale face. Unfortunately, she is holding her CD sideways, which makes her look none-too-bright. Sorry Emmy, next take lessons in how to present your item, not how to present yourself.
Lesson 7: Thin Clothing = Visible Nipples.
Today’s Lesson is one of the first on the subject of Visible Nipples. If you didn’t know, it is not socially acceptable for a female to show (or even show the outline of) her nipples in public. Unfortunately, poor clothing choice and circumstance make for good nipple viewing. Today’s particular nipple views come from the choice of thin clothing, and bright lights. One of the best specific examples is the lovely miss Anne Hathaway, who shows us that thin black garments are nearly invisible under bright lights. There are examples of other celebrities in the comments section.
Lesson 6: Pregnancy will change a woman’s body.
While our last lesson showed how a woman’s body can change during pregnancy, I neglected to show that things other then her breasts will grow. In fact, in some weapon, it seems every part of them grows seeming endlessly. I’ll give examples of certain beautiful ladies like Naomi Watts and various other celebs.
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Lesson 5: Babies will change a woman’s body.
Today’s Lesson is centered on the wonderful gift of nature called pregnancy. As a woman advances through her stages, more then her stomach grows. In fact, many other parts of an expecting mother will grow; some with great proportion. Let us take for example two women who were doing well hiding their bumps; Christina Aguilera and Nicole Richie. Both are showing off their newly grown breasties, and hiding their baby bumps. Way to make the most of an otherwise unattractive situation ladies.
Lesson 4: Clothing is not wind proof.
Today’s Lesson is based on the simple aerodynamic principle of wind-lifting-up-skirt. As shown here with the lovely Miss McPhee, even a light breeze will lift up a skirt if it is made of a material lighter then said wind. Fortunately Katherine McPhee is wearing a nice set of panties that actually covers some of her sweet looking cheeks, and for that matter has sweet-looking cheeks.
There are more proof pictures of Mischa Barton and her inability to combat the wind in the comments section.
Lesson 3: Milk does a body good.
Today’s Lesson deals with the beautiful substance called milk. Yes, milk reminds us of breasts, and breasts are sexy, but today’s milk lesson has nothing to do with sexy breasts; it has to do with calcium. And in trying to teach people that calcium builds strong bones and good skin, the good people over at the Milk Advisory Board have given us a good number of sexy breasts to look at. Thanks Milk People.
